My mission to prove virgins are cool

If you know me personally, you know I’m a proud virgin who won’t shut up about it. And honestly, the reason why is because at 19 I realized the majority of my friends were no longer virgins. Some never planned on waiting until marriage like I had, but a handful had made the commitment and broke it. One friend even asked me to lie for her. At that moment, I realized I was alone in this decision and if I was going to move forward, I needed to know why I was doing it. Putting on a ring at church at age 13 cuz everyone else was doing it wasn’t going to cut it anymore. It was a defining moment for me and unfortunately, I didn’t have anyone really to talk to about it. Either people weren’t virgins or they were closet virgins too afraid to show themselves. And that’s why I talk about it. No one was there for me.

Anywho, I got a chance today to share some real pros to waiting until marriage on a larger scale today. Thanks to the popularity of the awkward viral TLC video of a couple kissing for the first time on their wedding day, I was asked by an editor (and super awesome friend) at iVillage.com to write my own virgin diary. Hopefully it’ll show that we’re not all super awkward individuals. I know some couples personally who waited until their wedding day or until their engagement for their first kiss. I’m happy to report they didn’t look like birds pecking at a carcass.

Though I must say to the TLC couple, while your pre-wedding butterfly kisses terrify me, way to go for sticking to your guns. I know how hard it is to be a virgin in a non-virgin society. I can’t imagine not kissing until my wedding day. I think my heart would explode or I’d choke on my own nerves. In fact, i’m so nervous about our ceremony, Addison and I actually have practiced how our first kiss should look. So I commend you for really committing yourselves to something you believe in.

If you want to check out my crazy advice, click here! I’m on the front page of the health section too. Happy happy day! Though…disclaimer…they embellished the foreplay tip. I’m too much of a prude to say out loud that we’re passionate. I think it could be taken the wrong way. Also they totally snuck a pun in there that I didn’t get the first time I read it. Guess that proves I’m still a little awkward in some respects. But hey, it works for us! Oh and shockingly enough, Addison totally approved of this column before it went out. That’s my man! He’s such a trooper.

Hopefully some people will be encouraged by it. But I also hope no negativity arises because of it. I’ll try my best to ignore it if there is.

How we met…

You can’t really say much in the 300 characters allotted in the Simon G. Jewelry “Perfect Proposal” competition section about “Our Story.” So, I made it more about how while together, we’ve been apart for most of our relationship.

But I always kind of thought that how we met was sweet too. So here it is.

My freshman year I somehow got a job at the Plemmons Student Union at Appalachian State University by the grace of God. I’m pretty sure I snagged the last opening before school started. Most of my shifts were game room shifts, and lucky for me, most of my shifts were during a time where the older students who worked at the PSU who come, chill, and shoot pool.

More than once they had to save me when I would fail the cash register and so we all go to talking and we eventually became friends. They especially bonded over the fact that I turned red int he face over anything sexual (I was a very sheltered 18 year-old).

Eventually they’d laugh and be like, “This is awesome! We have a female Addison!”

Never hearing that name before now, I responded, “What is an addison?”

Turns out, Addison was a student who was gone that semester because he had back surgery. I would hear stories about him and people would compare us all the time.

Then, I met him. Someone introduced us, but we really didn’t get to talking until one day when an older friend, Sam, made the joke that the cash register did not like me because I was virgin. They loved teasing me about how I was a sworn virgin to marriage.

Addison happened to walk up at that moment and said, “Don’t feel bad. They tease me about that too.”

I immediately jumped up and gave him a hug and said, “I love you!”

Addison, who I discovered is super shy 99 percent of the time, turned beet red and stood as stiff as a board.

Later I would find out that is when he said he fell in love with me. I, on the other hand, had a boyfriend. In fact, I would still be unavailable for the next couple of months.

But until then, Addison was probably the best guy friend I ever had (and not in the “I’m-only-here-til-you’re-single-sort-of-way.” That’s probably why he still is my best friend today.

And now I’m going to marry my best friend, except we aren’t engaged yet. We’ve been talking about it seriously since early this past spring when I was still in D.C. When Addison said we could enter the Simon G. Jewelry “Perfect Proposal” comeptition to win a $10,000 ring, I was so excited. Honestly, while the ring is pretty, it isn’t about the ring to me. It’s just one less thing to take a burden off my man.

After all, it’s not the ring I want. It’s him.

(Though I must say, Simon G’s sparklies aren’t half bad)

Please consider voting for us!